Portrait 365 : 84-88

27 Mar Jesse
Jesse

Jesse

This l’il guy is so adorbs. It’s all about those deep browns….. heartbreaker in the making me thinks.

Coach John

Coach John

‘I just love playing with kids
I have boundless admiration for Coach John. He is possibly the most patient man I’ve ever met. Coach John is the big cheese at our Little Kickers and we’ve built a lovely rapport over the past year and a half.

Sylvia

Sylvia

‘My husband and I are designing and creating leather handles. Sometimes people struggle to visualise how amazing they will be but I’m just going to make them and trust my instincts.’
I saw this beautifully dressed lady from behind in a car park and I walked up to tell her she look amazing. She spun around and we instantly recognised each other from a party a few months ago where we had clicked. Anyway, we’re catching up for coffee. Pronto.

Anika

Anika

No matter how many times I ask her not to blow bubbles in the milk……… I remember just how fun it was. Love the splashes on her face.

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Nude yoga? Put that away.

26 Mar source

Picture this, a room full of people, both men and women, gentle music playing in the background with waterfalls and soft pan pipes echoing through the Andes or something equally quasi-relaxing.

Blue and purple yoga mats adorn the floor like a patchwork quilt and the room full of bodies are all breathing into their sore spots as they contort themselves in a downward dog.

Just another yoga class, right?

Now imagine they’re all naked.

Bare butts in the air, secret starfish winking with exertion, dangly bits doing what they do best and breasts, well, it depends I suppose.

Naked friggin’ yoga.

source

source

I read this article about it and it was not tongue in cheek, or joking in the slightest.

I cannot stop giggling. Really?

SERIOUSLY??????

People do that??

I’m down with a nude beach, hell, even nude volleyball if you want, but YOGA???

Even the grab quote makes me giggle like a 5 year old -

“When we’re naked, it’s like we’re all the same”

No, we’re not. We’re all beautifully different, and watching people do yoga at the best of times can be awkward. Penises doing a mini-Salute To The Sun is downright hilarious.

I dare say watching a magnificently formed creature do yoga would be quite something to behold (genitalia notwithstanding), but for the rest of the populace…. come on.

I realise that you’re probably supposed to be focused on your own breathing and stretching, but I confess I would not be able to concentrate in a room full of people putting the arse in Asana.

I’m no prude. Really, I’m not.

Skinny dipping, no problem. In fact I’m a fan.

Haven’t actually partaken in huge amounts of sober nude swimming, but after a tasty beverage or 100 I don’t take much convincing to waltz down the beach with my buns shining under the moonlight or dive into the neighbouring hotel’s pool as naked as a fish in the middle of the night.

(Safety warning – naked swimming whilst under the influence is not recommended by Bondi Rescue, particularly during daylight hours).

Changing in front of people? Well, depends on the circumstance.

If I know you, I’m pretty chilled. Almost every one of my friends will attest to that. Probably a little less overt now than I used to be though… but only just.

In a public change room I do the shuffle whereby I tend to poke my least embarrassing nude bits out at the public and turn the rest of me to the wall.  The result of moist, sticky skin and fuggy change rooms actually probably renders me looking somewhat epileptic.

Maybe naked yoga is just the thing I need to really bring me out of my shell?

It’s most definitely not a sexual thing. The Bold & Naked Yoga Studio openly stipulates on their website that -

‘IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR AN ORGASM, YOU ARE IN THE WRONG PLACE’.

That wouldn’t even cross my mind, to be honest.

During yoga I’m usually concentrating too hard on not falling over or farting to even consider arousal. What does cross my mind, however, is how could I ever scrub from my retina the vision of 20 starkers yoga fans doing the Frog Pose?

125-frog-pose-mandukasana

source

Arghhhhh, my eyes! MY EYES!!!!

Yoga has never really been my thing anyway. I’m more of a boxing/spin/smash my cardio type of trainer so maybe I’ll keep my eye out for Nude Spin.

That said, if Mister Dimples held a naked spin class I may require defibrillation before the class even started.

I’d dread to imagine what that would look like.

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Portrait 365 : 79 – 83

24 Mar Favorite Aunty Carol
Carolyn and Casey

Carolyn and Casey

“If I’m not talking about sleep I’m reading about it, researching it. I should just rest.”
I remember that feeling so well. You may remember these guys from my first few portraits. Casey was just a few weeks old.

Miles

Miles

“Today is an adventure for me. I don’t usually get the train but I put diesel in my tank instead of petrol this morning. I was distracted by a hot chick.”
Thankfully, it was a company car. Reckon he has Buckley’s of getting them to cover the cost of the diesel though.

Favorite Aunty Carol

Favorite Aunty Carol

“Never eat something you find in the crack”
She was referring to Kiki finding a sultana in the couch, but I think it’s a fairly poignant life lesson, no? This is my Favorite Aunty Carol. She’s been my Favorite Aunty Carol for as long as I remember. She and my Mama were BFFs at high school.

Sarina

Sarina

“I want to be an artist. I really love to draw.”
I returned some books to the library and walked smack into a Harmony Day soiree. There was a mix of people enjoying dancing and music and samosas.

Abe and Rose

Abe and Rose

“It’s a cruel trick to spring this on me before a coffee”
I’ve met Abe and Rose a couple of times, and I bumped into them at the markets. Abe runs organic veg/fruit/food delivery company The Vege Trail. If want awesome, fresh organics delivered to your door, check him out.

If you like what you’re seeing, why not like my Facebook page now as I have a little spiel there.

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Supermarket mayhem and spelt hot cross buns

22 Mar spelt cranberry hot cross buns

spelt hot cross bun ingredientsPeople with no children really don’t understand the pain that is grocery shopping with children.

They cruise blissfully up and down the aisles, maybe gently comparing products, reading labels and chatting on their phone. Parking their damned trolley in the middle of everything as they dawdle.

Every time I enter the supermarket with my two kids I feel like I’m on an episode of It’s a Knockout, or maybe one of those wacky Japanese game shows where a massive flesh eating lizard will bite your arse if you’re too slow.

I wish I was more organised and a meal planning type person but I’m not. I never know what I want to eat three days in advance so I end up spending a lot of time at the supermarket. I’m there at least three times a week on average.

The staff at my local know us by name, and I often ponder the fact that I’m there more regularly than them.

They’ve helped me find my lost children, watched me lose my shit, seen me forget my wallet after scanning a trolley load, and watched D Man ride the Guide Dog Association dog wearing Raybans and a smile.

I’m finding the usual mayhem has doubled or tripled now that there are shiny wrapped Easter eggs lurking down every aisle just waiting for chubby hands to knock over the display.

Which is imminent, no doubt.

spelt hot cross bun dough provingAnd will be as embarrassing as the penis in the meat department, I’m sure.

As patient and lovely as my local supermarket may be, I do have one complaint about them.

They don’t make great hot cross buns….. in fact, they don’t actually bake any on site, and by the time I get to the measly table stocking them there are only fruitless or chocolate chips ones left.

spelt hot cross bun makeshift piping bagFruitless hot cross buns are not the real deal, and neither, my friends, are chocolate chip.

However, if you’re looking for real deal hot cross buns, these are the shizzle.

They’re a little heavier than the traditional, you could use plain flour if you wanted, but we just fell in love with them and I’ll make these babies all year long.

Easter Schmeaster.

spelt cranberry hot cross bunsWhat you will need : 

    • 2 1/2  cups wholemeal spelt flour
    • 2 1/2 cups plain spelt flour
    • 1/4 cup caster sugar
    • 2 teaspoons yeast
    • 1 teaspoon sea salt
    • 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
    • 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
    • 1 teaspoon allspice
    • a few grinds of black pepper
    • 1 1/2  cups sultanas
    • 2/3 cup dried cranberries
    • finely grated zest of one orange
    • 1 egg

300ml milk

  • 100g butter

For the glaze :

  • 1/4 cup caster sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon allspice
  • 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

What you will need to do :

Set aside 3 tablespoons of plain spelt flour to make your crosses with and combine the rest in a large bowl with your wholemeal flour. Give it a quick whisk to get any lumps out.

Combine with fruit, sugar, yeast, spices, salt and orange zest. Stir through.

Pop your chopped up butter and milk on the stove and warm gently until the butter has melted. You only want your milk to be just above luke warm, not hot.

Make a well in your flour mix, crack in your egg and add your milk and give it a good stir to mix together.

Turn it out onto a well floured surface and knead, baby, knead, until it’s nice and smooth. Probably looking at no less than 7-10 minutes.

Lightly oil and clean bowl and put your dough in and cover with a clean tea towel and place somewhere warm for 40 minutes or until about double in size.

Knock it back and knead again, then cut into 12 equal pieces and shape into balls. Place them into an oiled square baking tray and cover again, leaving for a further 40 minutes. Once more they should about double in size.

Preheat oven to 220C.

Mix remaining flour with 1/4 water and make a smooth paste. Using a piping bag with tiny nozzle or a sandwich bag with the corner cut out pipe on your crosses. Mine were a bit manly but rustic is good.

Pop into oven for 10 minutes, then reduce heat to 200C and bake for a further 10-15 minutes until golden brown. They should sound hollow when tapped.

To make your glaze combine the sugar, spices and 1/4 cup of water and stick onto a medium heat in a saucepan until the sugar dissolves. Bring to the boil, reduce heat and leave to simmer for 1-2 minutes, not stirring. Brush glaze over buns straight from oven.

spelt cranberry hot cross bunsThese are best eaten the day they’re made with lashing of butter. The following day they’re great toasted, and the day after that……

Italian Bread and Butter Pudding. The recipe for the pudding is in my book, not on the blog.

If you have the book, check it out, if you don’t…. what are you doing???

Cook Once, Feed All COVER_lr

Cook Once, Feed All is about making your life easier whilst preparing nutritious and quick food for your family. Hailed by Mouths of Mums as the ‘must have recipe book for all families’, this book is a collection of family friendly recipes, all accompanied by stories from my life.

To order your hardcopy of Cook Once, Feed All head to the Holsby Shop right now and receive both the hard copy, and the ebook, plus my new mini ebook A Bit On The Side.

If you like what you’re reading why not like my Facebook page now or subscribe via email, to be sure to always keep up with the Holsbys.

Portrait 365 : 76, 77, 78

19 Mar Portrait 365 : 76

Portrait 365 : 76

I didn’t catch her name, but I got lots of great photos of her shaking her thang.

Georgia

Georgia

Fashion on the field.

Sama

Sama

‘Oh no, I’d never be the kind of mum who uses bribery to get her kids to do stuff’
Sama bribed her kid to go to football today. No judgment here, I did too.

 

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5 Snack Series with Mouths of Mums

18 Mar date slice

smoothies for toddlers (1 of 1)You may have recently seen me spruik on my Facebook page my recent article for Mouths For Mums.

It was 5 Great Snacks for Toddlers.

What I failed to mention was it’s actually a 5 part series over the coming weeks whereby we cover snacks for every age group (including grown ups. There will be wine and chocolate in that one as they are their own angelic food group which is as important and vegetables in my mind).

Snacks are the things we eat between meals that keep us going.

date sliceThere is a mood that occurs when you wait too long between meals and that is known as HANGRY.

As it suggests it’s a combo of hungry, and angry. I get moody (cranky ass, impatient, short tempered) when I’m hungry, as do my spawn.

As do most people, possibly you.

Although snacks are largely interchangeable and anyone can eat any of them, I’m really working on the idea of concentration spans at snack times, i.e. little kids have NONE, packing in nutrients and fruit and vegetables (sneaking them in), and energy required for growing bodies and busy minds.

Today we’re taking a look at the Pre-Schooler. They are a strange and wonderful species with boundless energy and curiosity.

Head over to Mouths of Mums and check it out – 5 Great Snacks for Pre-Schoolers.

banana coco maple yoghurt

Cook Once, Feed All COVER_lr

Cook Once, Feed All is about making your life easier whilst preparing nutritious and quick food for your family. Hailed by Mouths of Mums as the ‘must have recipe book for all families’, this book is a collection of family friendly recipes, all accompanied by stories from my life.

To order your hardcopy of Cook Once, Feed All head to the Holsby Shop right now and receive both the hard copy, and the ebook, plus my new mini ebook A Bit On The Side.

If you like what you’re reading why not like my Facebook page now or subscribe via email, to be sure to always keep up with the Holsbys.

Portrait 365 : 72, 73, 74, 75

16 Mar Anika

Alka-shah

Alka-shah

‘The first two years of our marriage we lived in different countries. I think children make the family but for now we are both gaining knowledge so we are set up for our futures’.
Alka-Shah is from Nepal, but she studied in Thailand, before moving to Australia. Quite the nomad, but she’s here to stay.

Bones

Bones

Bones didn’t have much to say for himself. To be honest, I think he was hungry.

Anika

Anika

‘See birds? See feather?’
Not sure what the fascination was but she was hell bent on sticking the cockatoo feather into her ear. Like, right in. Sometimes you need to let them work out how far is too far, but I thought this day was not a good day for that.

Jah-Bya

Jah-Bya

‘I am from Jamaica and I like to bring my music to the people. Jamaica is a good place because everyone is welcome. Different to here.’
Jah-Bya rocks out Radio Skid Row for all who dig a little smooth reggae action. I’m a fan personally. Reminds me of my crazy time in the Caribbean.

If you like what you’re seeing, why not like my Facebook page now as I have a little spiel there.

You can also subscribe via email, or follow me on Instagram at The Holsbys to be sure to always keep up with the Holsbys.

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