I have a big fat confession to make…..I have struggled my arse off to get this to you this round.
My tightrope has been a little wobbly this past fortnight, and I realised that maybe I needed to chill a little before my brain bent irreversibly! Everything is balancing out now and I’m super looking forward to going away to Uluru next week.
Imagine the portraits I’ll get out there?? Reckon that’ll get me right back in the saddle.
I know you’re waiting for the latest instalment so here they are, and my tardiness just means that there is more for you to love this time, like a fat bottomed girl that makes the rocking’ world go ’round.
“What would you say to your 15 year old self?”
“I would give that kid a massive hug – even though she would pretend she didn’t want it. And I would say “You won’t believe how well this is going to turn out. And for the love of God, lose the green eye shadow.”
It’s no secret I have the biggest lady crush on Champagne Carolyn. She is a great big shining beacon in my life right now…..and a little bit of a bad influence.
“A potential friend has to first and foremost satisfy one criteria; that they make me hurt laughing, when I’m sober. There are other boxes to tick, but the people I laugh with or at the most are the people I love the most.”
I went to primary school with this bird for about 6 months in year 6 and I thought she was amazing. Fast forward 25 years and we reconnected through the blog. We caught up in human when I was on the Gold Coast. I still think she is amazing.
“My first orgasmic experience was in the shower with a shampoo bottle”
We may or may not have been slightly boozy during this conversation. Go and check Shae’s blog out. She calls herself the hippy next door and she’s a lot of fun.
“I’d tell my 15 year old self don’t take life too seriously. Things will work out in the end.”
A tiny chat in park led to a lighter mood and a shared smile.
I’m so bummed I lost this guy’s quote. But basically he told me that anything is possible. He speaks 5 languages, has 5 businesses and was here travelling from the Middle East from memory but he really wanted to say don’t limit yourself. You can do whatever you want.
If this is you and you see this, get in touch with me, please!
“I hid behind the bocce-drome and I kissed a kid called Roger. It was my first kiss. Naturally, there was about 3 other kids gathered around watching. It was really dreamy. He was a good kid.”
I’ve been watching this chick for about a year and been secretly jealous of her talent. When I met her, though, that just fell away and we talked the real stuff and laughed, and we hugged. Bianca Wordley is as amazing in real life as she is on the page.
“Ann Stacey was a girl who lived around the corner and one afternoon she was sitting on a gate to a field at the end of my street. One day we just kissed and then we were boyfriend and girlfriend. I was about 14.”
Reckons he’s not photogenic. Whatevs.
Happy 4th Birthday, darling Foxy Pants.
“I’d tell my 15 year old self that boys with long hair look good but they’re more trouble than they’re worth.”
Once upon a time Peta was my baby cousin. I guess she still is but now she’s a stunning, intelligent woman who loves a short haired man.
“Tom was my formal partner’s good mate and we ended dating for a whole year before he dumped me really badly. Then we’d get back together and then he’d dump me again.We did it about three times. The first two times broke my heart but then I became blasé about it. I think it was habitual.”
You know when someone tells you you’re gonna love someone and you’re all sceptical because you’re jaded and shit? Let me tell you, Champagne Gillian did not disappoint. She was everything I was told she was and then some. A true pleasure to be around.
“It’s hard to pick one thing that I’m proud of because I’ve always enjoyed everything I’ve done. I started Double J radio station and I enjoyed that. Then I became a furniture maker and I enjoyed that too. Now I’ve moved to the suburbs and I am a gardening enthusiast which I really enjoy. Oh, and I enjoy making curries.”
I’v known Graeme for almost 20 years. He used to drink at a bar I worked at and when I left there I never saw him…. until recently when I’ve seen him twice walking past my grandparent’s house in the middle of nowhere. He hasn’t aged a day.