Ramblings of a Suburban Urbanite

Is there an elephant in your bedroom?

July 17, 2014

sexy 2 Did you know that getting it on is really good for you?

I mean Zumba is ok but the horizontal rumba kicks its arse all day long.

Sex boosts your immune system, can lower the risk of heart attack and stroke, makes your hair shinier, and can help battle the effects of mild depression and anxiety.

With sex being the most awesome multivitamin in the world, we should be banging the be-jesus out of each other all the damned time, but the fact is, most of us aren’t doing it like they do it on the Discovery Channel.

I can’t speak for everyone, because I have no idea what happens to a large majority of couples once you add kids, sleepless nights, endless housework, a dash of resentment, and regular exhaustion, but of the ladies I speak to candidly and regularly about sex,  almost all of them complain about the same thing.

The most physical they feel like getting with their partner is punching him in the face….. no, not really (maybe, sort of), but they don’t feel like giving him one either.

I’ve written before that I reckon rumpy pumpy is the tie that binds you as a couple, and if you ain’t doing it those shoes left laying in the lounge room, and the putting the washing beside the laundry hamper really start to get on your tits. Basically, if you’re getting regular intimacy (read : schnuggles and schtooping) you’re more grounded as a couple.

Less easily pissed.

Sexy-Kiss-sexy-couple-sexy-kiss-Love-between-Woman-et-Man-sexy-BLACK-AND-WHITE-PASSION-THE-FEELING-THAT-ABSORBS-YOU-heplusshe_large_large

That’s a fact.

If the intimacy element of your relationship is slipping, it doesn’t take long to become a whacking great elephant in the room. You’re avoiding each other, feigning sleep, maybe you’re even ‘doing it’ just to make the other person happy…. that’s a bit awks… Obligatory sex?

Eew.

Remember my old buddy Isiah McKimmie, the sex therapist? She’s started up a new program called Juicy, Sexy, Love.

Juicy-Sexy-Love_Logo_FINAL

I was so pumped (not a euphemism) when I heard about it that when she offered my peeps a free crack at her introductory program I jumped at the chance because if you get onto this stuff early enough it can be a game changer for your relationship….as in, save that shit from going south-er-er.

Know what I’m saying?

Juicy, Sexy, Love. discusses the importance of intimacy as a couple, but it also delves into the other stuff, the really important stuff that will help your love life…… the stuff like –

Loving yourself.

Valuing yourself.

Feeling sexy and sexual and worthy of love and pleasure.

Remember that stuff?

That shit can be hard when you’re nipple deep in the daily sludge.

Isiah talks about the balance in your relationship. The balance of respect, the balance of power. You see sex isn’t just about the beast with two backs.

90% of love making is in your head, so if the planets aren’t aligning, you ain’t feeling the va-va-va-voom.

Anyway, the program itself is not open yet, but Isiah has given you peeps access to her 3 Keys to a Juicy Relationship, so you can suss it out and see if it’s something you think you can benefit from.

3 Keys to a Juicy Relationship is a three part video series, with little ‘play sheets’ so you and your partner can work together to reconnect, and rekindle your spark.

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JUICY SEXY LOVE IS FOR YOU IF:

  • You’re ready to take action to improve your relationship and sex life.
  • You know that there are two people in a relationship and you have to work together to make it work.
  • You want to feel happier, more confident and have more energy.
  • You want to argue less and love more.
  • You’re willing to invest 8 weeks into making your relationship awesome.
  • You’re worried about what will happen to your relationship if things don’t get better again soon.

JUICY SEXY LOVE IS NOT FOR YOU IF:

  • You want someone else to do the work on your relationship for you.
  • You want to blame your partner for what is happening in your relationship.
  • You’re not willing to set aside time to make your relationship better.
  • You’re having multiple, long-term problems in your relationship (we suggest you seek help through coaching).
  • You want to leave your relationship.

** This is not a sponsored post. I’m just a big fan of sex and shiny hair **

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5 Comments

  • Reply Have A Laugh On Me July 17, 2014 at 10:37 am

    The best free thing in life I reckon – a bit of action!

  • Reply ana74x July 17, 2014 at 11:39 am

    I have to agree that it can really glue a couple together just that bit extra, in order to make all the daily drudgery less of an issue. It’s a bit sad only hearing about how married couples throw their sex life out the window after babies and kids.

  • Reply San July 17, 2014 at 5:03 pm

    Intimacy/lovemaking SOOO starts with the mind. I really believe you have to respect and identify with the way your partner’s mind works before the ‘lurve’ shines through. Prior to that it’s sex, fulfilling a physical need, and that’s a completely different kettle of fish :o) Is there an elephant in our bedroom… well metaphorically speaking no but relationships have to be constantly nurtured and worked at and we’re wanting to do that so bring it on!!! Is there an elephant in our bedroom literally speaking??? well yeah, but I’m woikin’ on it!!! (don’t s’pose you need a training partner???)

  • Reply Sam Stone July 20, 2014 at 10:40 am

    I should really look into this.

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